A lot has happened since I sat down and wrote my last blog. I have gained weight and I have lost weight. I'm always meticulously counting my macros. My workouts have sucked, and then my workouts have gotten better. I have changed jobs...again. Kate and I are closer to being married. And I am best friends with an IFPA Pro Bodybuilder. That's right. Jason Childs went three for three with his shows and won his pro card. And then won a pro show. The guy's a freak.
I'm very proud of him not just because he won. Because he did it all while balancing work, being a loving husband, and one of the best fathers I have ever seen. He has also introduced me to some great people who are helping me on my journey. These guys and gals have become such great supporters and friends. They are all very driven and motivated people. Surround yourself with like-minded people and greatness will happen.
Not to get sappy, but Jason said something to me when he won his last show that really meant a lot to me. Kate wasn't able to make it to this show. I was the only one there that didn't have his significant other. I made a joke when we took the group picture and said, "here's fifth wheel Kyle". After the picture was taken Jason hugged me, smeared my shirt with Dream Tan and said words that I will never forget.
"You are not a fifth wheel ever. You belong here." Simple words, with huge impact and meaning.
I'm very proud of him not just because he won. Because he did it all while balancing work, being a loving husband, and one of the best fathers I have ever seen. He has also introduced me to some great people who are helping me on my journey. These guys and gals have become such great supporters and friends. They are all very driven and motivated people. Surround yourself with like-minded people and greatness will happen.
Not to get sappy, but Jason said something to me when he won his last show that really meant a lot to me. Kate wasn't able to make it to this show. I was the only one there that didn't have his significant other. I made a joke when we took the group picture and said, "here's fifth wheel Kyle". After the picture was taken Jason hugged me, smeared my shirt with Dream Tan and said words that I will never forget.
"You are not a fifth wheel ever. You belong here." Simple words, with huge impact and meaning.
Now then, lets dive in. I like heavy metal music. You probably know this by now. Black Label Society has a song called S.D.M.F. and the words give me inspiration. SDMF has become part of my life, though I have tweaked it a bit. I took out the 'merciless' and replaced it with 'motivation'. Though merciless has its place - you'll see what I mean.
What does each of these words mean to me? Quite a bit actually. Each one has a multitude of meanings that help shape my life. Make no mistake, I have not shaped my life after a heavy metal song, my wardrobe maybe but not my life.
What does each of these words mean to me? Quite a bit actually. Each one has a multitude of meanings that help shape my life. Make no mistake, I have not shaped my life after a heavy metal song, my wardrobe maybe but not my life.
Strength
What is true strength? Does it mean being able to lift X number of pounds off the floor, push X number of pounds off your chest/over your head or squat X number of pounds for reps? Yes. Does true strength mean grinding out two or three more reps at the end of your last set? Yes. Does true strength mean doing that extra set or that last 10 minutes of cardio? Yes. In my mind that is true strength. But, strength is also the ability to say no to cheating on your diet. Strength is drinking water or a diet soda when all your friends are having beer/wine or whatever. Strength is eating your pre-made meal out of your Tupperware when all your friends at work ordered Domino's. For someone who has struggled with overeating their whole life, I think that latter is what true strength is.
What is true strength? Does it mean being able to lift X number of pounds off the floor, push X number of pounds off your chest/over your head or squat X number of pounds for reps? Yes. Does true strength mean grinding out two or three more reps at the end of your last set? Yes. Does true strength mean doing that extra set or that last 10 minutes of cardio? Yes. In my mind that is true strength. But, strength is also the ability to say no to cheating on your diet. Strength is drinking water or a diet soda when all your friends are having beer/wine or whatever. Strength is eating your pre-made meal out of your Tupperware when all your friends at work ordered Domino's. For someone who has struggled with overeating their whole life, I think that latter is what true strength is.
Does that sound stupid? It kind of is. But not everyone has ever sought refuge in food. I have. There are days that food is a non-issue for me. There are days where I can just use food for what it truly is, fuel. That's not to say that I don't like to enjoy eating it, but it really is just fuel. For the day, for the workouts, to replenish after the workout, you know, all that crap.
But there are days that I walk down the aisle in the grocery stores and cravings hit so hard that it's almost undeniable. It's like my brain shuts off and my emotions take over. I want to get whatever I want to eat, take it home, eat it (ALL OF IT), and then I sit there in the reality of my failure with shame and crumbs on my now distended gut, and realize how weak I actually was.
Bottom line is be strong. Lift your weights. Do your cardio. Don't cheat on your diet (by that I mean eat within your boundaries not clean eating VS IIFYM - holy crap I don't need to have this discussion AGAIN). Do what you need to do.
Determination
This is an easy one to define. Set a damn goal and go for it. Know what you need to and do it. Know how you need to lift, and lift that way. Know what you need to do for cardio and do it. Follow YOUR diet. Get smarter. Get help. Ask questions.
If this means getting up at 4AM to do your cardio, do it. If it means doing all your meal prep Sunday nights, do it. True determination means sticking to your guns, putting your head phones in and grinding out your workouts, eating your meals and wading through all the bullshit. Believe me, there is a lot of it.
Determination isn't something you can fake - you can't go through the motions. You can clearly tell the difference between the truly determined, and those who aren't. Typically the person who IS determined doesn't say a whole lot about it. They just do it. The person who IS NOT determined will more than happily tell you about how determined they are but will secretly over or under eat, sluff off with their meal prep, will skip workouts (especially leg day), give their cardio the brush off and spends a majority of their time in the gym chatting up the front desk staff and scrolling the news feed on a bench.
Motivation/Merciless
OK, so we actually can put motivation up with determination. One who is truly motivated will do all the things that I listed above, or their own version of it. The reason I say that, is because my goals are different than his, and hers, and probably yours. There is no master plan. There is more than one way to achieve victory...I digress...
Motivation is something that comes from within. It's not watching a bunch of clips on YouTube. It's not that one song that you need to put on. It's not the poster of Arnold, or Tom Brady or whomever. At the end of the day, your motivation comes from you. I'm not saying that those things don't help motivate you. If you need to picture yourself as Arnold or TB12 to do your best, do it. If you need to listen to Just Give Me A Reason by Pink and that dude from FUN - I'm looking at you Jason Childs - do it. But those are just fuel to your fire. YOU need to be the spark.
Merciless is different. There are only two things that I am truly merciless with: my time and my diet. I sacrifice sleep, family time, and outings with friends because I need to get my lift or cardio or both for the day. I sacrifice cakes, pies, pizza, beer because sometimes you just can't make them fit your macros - sometimes you can. Is that what merciless truly is? Probably not. But sometimes people have to realize that you will do whatever it takes to accomplish a goal. I want to be a bodybuilder. Period. I will be merciless and do what I have to do.
Forever
When I say FOREVER at the end SDMF I think that means your committed to being strong FOREVER. You're committed to being determined FOREVER and you will be motivated and merciless FOREVER.
Forever is a very, very long time. It's it. There's nothing longer than forever. Someday, I think that we all will find out just how long forever actually is, but until then I'm just going to keep counting my macros, lifting heavy crap and sweating balls on the StairMaster.
S.D.M.F.
-Brann
If this means getting up at 4AM to do your cardio, do it. If it means doing all your meal prep Sunday nights, do it. True determination means sticking to your guns, putting your head phones in and grinding out your workouts, eating your meals and wading through all the bullshit. Believe me, there is a lot of it.
Determination isn't something you can fake - you can't go through the motions. You can clearly tell the difference between the truly determined, and those who aren't. Typically the person who IS determined doesn't say a whole lot about it. They just do it. The person who IS NOT determined will more than happily tell you about how determined they are but will secretly over or under eat, sluff off with their meal prep, will skip workouts (especially leg day), give their cardio the brush off and spends a majority of their time in the gym chatting up the front desk staff and scrolling the news feed on a bench.
Motivation/Merciless
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| Me with IFPA Pro & Pink fan, Jason Childs |
Motivation is something that comes from within. It's not watching a bunch of clips on YouTube. It's not that one song that you need to put on. It's not the poster of Arnold, or Tom Brady or whomever. At the end of the day, your motivation comes from you. I'm not saying that those things don't help motivate you. If you need to picture yourself as Arnold or TB12 to do your best, do it. If you need to listen to Just Give Me A Reason by Pink and that dude from FUN - I'm looking at you Jason Childs - do it. But those are just fuel to your fire. YOU need to be the spark.
Merciless is different. There are only two things that I am truly merciless with: my time and my diet. I sacrifice sleep, family time, and outings with friends because I need to get my lift or cardio or both for the day. I sacrifice cakes, pies, pizza, beer because sometimes you just can't make them fit your macros - sometimes you can. Is that what merciless truly is? Probably not. But sometimes people have to realize that you will do whatever it takes to accomplish a goal. I want to be a bodybuilder. Period. I will be merciless and do what I have to do.
Forever
When I say FOREVER at the end SDMF I think that means your committed to being strong FOREVER. You're committed to being determined FOREVER and you will be motivated and merciless FOREVER.
Forever is a very, very long time. It's it. There's nothing longer than forever. Someday, I think that we all will find out just how long forever actually is, but until then I'm just going to keep counting my macros, lifting heavy crap and sweating balls on the StairMaster.
S.D.M.F.
-Brann
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| Team Grit - Where I Belong |
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